Archive for the ‘Family’ Category
Aug
24
Posted by Arianne
I’m so in love with my camera family, that I just have to post some pictures for you. Do you mind?
These were taken at a recent day at the Lincoln Park Zoo, which is like the best place ever. I wish I lived next door.
We all had a big family outing because this guy was in town:
He thinks he’s cool because he’s almost 21. He’ll always be the baby.
This girl is going to have to be locked in her room until she’s 25. She’s my niece-ling, and first granddaughter.
She came from these two totally average looking people:
She has a special bond with this guy, my middle child, pre-scissor attack (he put his hat on her and then they both posed).
Then we have this guy, my baby, who is not at all photogenic.
He is really good at smiling his way out of any predicament. Just like his Dad.
Then we have my oldest, who is near impossible to get smiling, especially a natural smile. He hates photos, but somehow we caught this pic of him smiling. This face doesn’t happen very often, so we swoon over it something fierce. The fact that it seems like he’s looking me in the eye, something which is also rare, gives me butterflies. I could look at this photo all day…
What a day.
Aug
20
Posted by Arianne
I’ve been really enjoying watching the olympics lately–the exciting endings, heart breaking defeats. The Phelps effect. All so beautiful, to see what normal people can do with extraordinary skill, if they put their mind to it.
But even more moving has been to watch the footage of all the mothers of the athletes. I cry with them, as they see their child win yet another gold, and I cry with them as they hurt for their child who missed their chance and must now live with losing what coule be the most important competition of their life.
I think it all makes me emotional because I imagine my boys doing these feats of greatness, and I can almost feel what it’s like to be the mother of a child who receives such recognition. Gold medal? Silver or bronze medal? How proud I would be!
But I also know that my children will be great, no matter if they decide to be Olympians or to be a struggling artist. If they choose the path of a Starbucks barista or if they join the Peace Corps and go out to save the world. It’s that unconditional love, that we realize now more than ever, that is not always freely given by those you love. For us, it’s easy. It’s who we are.
The greatness of spirit that my boys posess means they will be touching lives no matter what their profession, or if they win competitions, awards or accolades. Changing a life just by being themselves is one of their superpowers now, so I know I can expect that greatness to continue.
As I look out the window of the future, I see a glimpse. A moment here or there of “oh he will make a great gymnast!” or “He’s definitely going to be a famous writer”, but in the end that window, although gleaming brightly, still stays blurry. And so I wait with excited anticipation to see which path they choose, knowing I’ll be there for them every step of the way.
Aug
19
Posted by Arianne
How silly of me to want to grow out his hair, when his brother CLEARLY had other ideas.
The funny thing is, I don’t know if he’s going to let me fix it without a major fight.
He LOVES it. His brother LOVES it (well, it’s his work, and he’s standing behind it no matter what).
At first I thought he looked like a balding accountant.
He’s still a Los Angeles boy at heart. He told me he looks like a “cool punk dude” and now he’s ready for his first day of school ever. Montessori wants them to express themselves, but I don’t think they had this in mind.
You don’t even want to see the back. Unless you feel like crying.
But yesterday, post-hair disaster, he asked another kid at the park what his name was. For the first time ever. I wanted to hold a party. Autism can suckit.
They’re getting better, friends. The light at the end of the tunnel is so, so bright now.
Jun
27
Posted by Arianne
Yesterday I mentioned that today I was posting a big giveaway…well, it’s delayed a bit more until I can get some technical details worked out. Sorry to get you all worked up about it, but maybe I should just start seeing how long I can drag this out? Hmmm…
In the mean time, and while I’m at the Babywearing Conference today, please go read about what happened to me yesterday with my son, and the immense hope it gave me. There is hope for the hopeless.
Jun
22
Posted by Arianne
It’s officially the summer, and my body is aching to be out in it and not just observing from the reflection in my computer screen. Lazy days, late daylight, all of it screams relaxation.
Ashlee has us all writing our top ten things we love about summer, and so I’m joining in. Today my mind is at the beach, and I wish my body was there too. Living on the west coast for the last several years before moving to the Midwest, our summers were planned around beach outings and long beach vacations. My family rents a house on the beach and tons of us and our significant others and our kids and our friends all squeeze into the house, trying to find a bed somewhere (usually on the floor), just so we can hear the ocean while we sleep. Every single summer, our vacation is at the beach. Even now that my “beach” is on Lake Michigan, I still can’t get enough.
My top ten things I love about the beach:
1. The Water–nothing like sitting and looking out over the massiveness of the water. Ocean or Lake, it’s a sight to behold. The water seems to know that I love it. The salty ocean is my favorite, spraying me and hitting me with it’s waves. The strength is overwhelming.
2. The Sand–I am continually amazed at the endless amount of things you can do and make with sand. Laying on it to warm up, digging your feet it, making a pillow, a castle, all of it. I love how it’s totally acceptable to have sand everywhere when you’re living or staying at the beach. I love showers with a pile of sand on the bottom, showing the remnants of another fun day.
3. The Sun–There’s really no escaping the sun when you are at the beach. It’s warmth seems to pierce you all the way to your brain, relaxing you to the core. We all wear sunscreen, but getting that golden look and seeing my kids brown up every so slightly is yet another sign that summer is upon us.
4. Cool nights–As the summer day will go on, eventually you reach into your beach bag and pull out a sweatshirt, a jacket, something to stave off the chill. But that chill is perfect. I can’t get enough. Which brings us to…
5. Bonfires–At least one night of our beach vacation we make sure to snag one of the big fire pits along the beach and we have to sit next to it all day to make sure no one else gets it. By the time the sun goes down we have the wood and the chairs and the marshmallows and the wine and the beach party continues.
6. The Boardwalk–Our favorite vaca spot is in San Diego, and the boardwalk is a source of major entertainment. The people watching is legendary, and certain characters are so well known that we are disappointed if we don’t have at least one sighting during our visit. On such a person is “Flash”. A man who is tall and tan and lean and rollerblades in only a thong. But that’s not all…he paints his tush and sort of dresses up in some theme. His 4th of July “outfit” is the American flag painted across his cheeks with another flag (with the stick) stuck between them. The cheeks, that is. It’s horrifying and hilarious and we always hope to see Flash every year.
7. The Sunset–Oh man. The sunsets draw visitors in their own right, and as the sun is making it’s adieu, on-lookers all stop in their tracks. You look left and right and every single person is stopped and staring. If you’re lucky, you’ll even see a Green Flash.
8. The Smells–The salty, sweaty amazing scents of the beach immediately bring back the best of memories. One whiff of a coconut tanning lotion and I’m 16 again.
9. The Food–The snow cones that are the best in the world, the grilled food including baked potatoes and corn, the fresh pinneaple, and of course the ice cream. You are never on a diet at the beach.
10. The Family–The beach wouldn’t be the same without all of my family coming together. We play card games, and talk until the wee hours and laugh endlessly. We also usually have at least one theme party (last year was a Tiki Party theme) and we all dress up and my mom plans at least one craft that we are all forced to do but love it anyway. All sleeping in the same house reminds us of growing up together, and hanging out all the beach all day long, playing frisbee in the surf, horseshoes in the sand, and napping side by side on our beach towels. By the end of our vacation we are sad to leave, it hurts our heart even, but we know we will all be back there together again. And we count the days.
Jun
20
Posted by Arianne
My 3yo is destined to be an artist in some way, and one of his many gifts is his way with words. A writer in training? I would love it. Because, if you combine his attitude with his intuitive and creative nature–well, be prepared for an adventure into the English language.
Just today, we’ve witnessed the following:
After a discussion about chipmunks eating nuts he said, “What is it I said again? Oh yeah, I want to give chickenmonks coconuts.”.
Then a little while ago, after talking about looking up wasps on the internet, and he said, “What?! We could look up anything? Even monkey butts??!!!!!”.
After meeting a new friend at the park called Armando, he insisted on calling him “Golden”, instead. Maybe he knew something about “Armando” that we didn’t know?
No matter what crazy thing is coming out of his mouth, it’s sure to entertain and sure to be dunked in a good bath of attitude and self importance. Let’s not forget the legendary applesauce conversation or the fact that when he’s older he will grow a beard and not listen to me. I can hardly wait.
What funny thing did your children say today?
Jun
17
Posted by Arianne
All too often I notice myself sitting still in the same place in life. It might be a place of resistance against things to come, like me thinking if I put off a phone call or put off opening the mail, the inevitable won’t really happen this time (can’t someone stop the bills from coming each month?). Or it could be just not realizing that changes have happened around me, and needing to notice them and embrace this new season of life.
Tonight as I went through my son’s book bag from school I realized that I’ve been in the same place with him, too, for far too long.
In my head he’s this little kid who needs me for every step he takes in his world. And in my head he needs me to tell him what to play with, to break down every transition enough so that he doesn’t get freaked out, and to give him deep pressure massage every night to help with sensory issues.
But the reality is that he’s growing up–almost 6 now–and is getting better, has his own desires, is making his own decisions and is moving forward without mom holding his hand at every step of the way.
In the book bag I noticed, in a tiny pocket that is meant for a cell phone, that he had folded up a picture until it was small enough to fit perfectly into the pocket. I smiled as I imagined him scouting out the pocket and preparing the picture for it’s new tiny home, folding each crease carefully. So methodically. In another small pocket I noticed a portion of a rock. It looked like it was broken, maybe even as if it was fossilized. It was deep in this pocket, zipped up and likely had been forgotten about. Later on, he would tell me that it was a crystal from school, and he wanted it to stay in that pocket forever.
It struck me so powerfully that this little person would have ideas like “this rock is cool and I want to take it home”. That one minute kids are the tiniest of humans, relying on us for every idea, every whim, and the next they are plucking one single rock off the ground and bringing it home as a keepsake, not even thinking of mentioning it to their mom. Simply relying on the fact that it’s *their* rock, and keeping the secret to themselves.
Now as I look back, and realize that no longer does he need me as often for transitions, for deep pressure or for ideas about what to play with…I am thrilled at what the future will bring. While it feels bittersweet to be needed less and less, I also know that means that huge new discoveries are around the corner, and independence is that much closer. I am excited to get to know this new, improved, and independent boy, and hope next time he has a secret crystal he will ask me to hold it for him.
Jun
15
Posted by Arianne
Today is a special day, and even though our family will be celebrating on a day when my own dad is back in town, I still want to take today to thank my dad, and my children’s dad (who I happen to also have been married to for 10 years), for being who they are. For being amazing examples of padres fantasticos (shout out to my husband’s lonely Spanish degree, that sits in a box somewhere and will never be used).
The Age of Autism posted a perfect tribute, that says exactly how I feel, and which I dedicate to my husband and my dad:
To the Grandfathers who donate their time and money and knowledge to help their grandchildren…
…To the men who hold onto their child during a meltdown - while Mom grabs the activated charcoal. To the men who miss T-ball and soccer practices, instead going to speech therapy and social skills groups
Read more at the link, and also don’t miss the awesome comments. They also posted this very moving ad from National Autism Association, spreading the idea of recovery from autism so well:
Also, my sister posted about my dad, completely perfect I can’t possibly follow it, so you might as well just go read her post and know that I mean every word of it as well.
Happy father’s day to you all, and thanks to my dad and my husband for being amazingly patient and kind and wise and cheesy. Carni’s rule.
Jun
14
Posted by Arianne
Just had this….”conversation”, if you will, with my 3 year old son:
Him: “What do I look like?”
Me: “What?”
Him: “What do I look like?!”
Me: “Like a boy.”
Him: “What is that?”
Me: “Huh? Ok, what are we talking about here?”
Him: “Applesauce.”
Me: “Um…ok.”
Him: “That’s what I thought.”
Jun
09
Posted by Arianne
**Apologies to my feed readers for inundating you with a billion Flickr pics, I had no idea that would happen! Problem. Fixed.**
Last Friday was a big day for my hubs and I…our 10 year wedding anniversary! We celebrated by falling asleep early in someone else’s bed (one of the kids’). Yes, we are *that* exciting, don’t you wish you were us.
I was inspired by Beth (and a post she linked to that I cannot find!) to post a pic and a “reason why” for each year we’ve been married, in honor of our blessed union amen. You’re about to get a whole lotta Jacob, so hang on to your hat…
1. He loved me even when I was pasty white (worse than now) and looked like I was 13 (probably because he did too).
2. He didn’t mind when my dad and brother made him pose like Spiderman, WITH Spiderman.
3. He jumped into fatherhood with both feet, never realizing the highs and lows that lie ahead.
4. He took me to the ocean and west coast living, which made me realize I’m a beach bum at heart.
5. He’s the perfect father, knowing exactly what his boys need.
6. And loves me through the hard times, as we watch our special needs boys grow and struggle and learn to navigate their world.
7. He made Italy an amazing getaway, showing me one of the most beautiful cities in the world.
8. And he rocks at falling asleep on command (or just any time he sits still).
9. He’s still the hawtest thing around…
Oh no, how did that pic get in here? Whoops…
10. And he puts up with all my shenanigans and thinks I’m the fun-est and funniest person on the Earth.
Love you hun.
P.S. Here’s a pic to make up for the rogue Johnny Depp appearance…who loves you baby…
