There is this place where I go when I talk to God.
Somewhere in the in between.
Where things aren’t so tethered.
God said to go there even when I’m not praying.
Just to be.
To notice larger things.
To hear whispers like “this is temporary…”
That place seems a tiny line between denial and surrender…
We get to choose which side we fall on.
***
A baby cries and it feels forever and
my body isn’t as young as it was before.
Things torn in my soul have been torn in other literal ways.
I’m healing.
My first baby and my last baby are the only two
who cried when they were born.
The middle boys simply looked around in peace.
Mabel never needed to cry.
River cried loud and gulped in the air for herself
and her sister.
And knows things already.
She is taking in too much of her world and
it’s too much but this is how her gift will be.
She senses the world and
knows things and
will probably do it more than even me.
<3
baby tee : misha lulu
(misha lulu is on sale right now at minisocial!)
purple dot leggings : estella via gilt
matryoshka doll : c/o fawn & forest
Linking up a day late (aka newborn time)
with Mama Loves Papa for Small Style
River’s first!
{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }
I. Love. Her. OMG. I want to snack on her cheeks and nibble her neck under her chin. #deathbycute
Lisa @ Crazy Adventures in Parenting´s last blog ..Welcome Home, Soldier!
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I really hope to finally hold her someday soon. I feel like I already have let her, just want to touch and smell. :)
Steph
Adventures In Babywearing´s last blog ..Sunday through Thursday
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*met her
Adventures In Babywearing´s last blog ..Sunday through Thursday
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I just can’t get enough of her. And I’m thinking of you, sweet mama. Always.
Tricia´s last blog ..Babywearing 101
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Oh, she is just so…incredibly River-ish. And I love that place of which you speak. I pray that I, too, can just be.
Bridget´s last blog ..Favorite Phrase Friday {October 28, 2011}
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ugh, so precious. i know I need to enjoy my time, the 10+ weeks I have left in this pregnancy, but I long to be on your end of the journey.
DesignHER Momma´s last blog ..It’s a rice cooker! But it makes eggs too!
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we get to choose what side we fall on.
oh wow. yeah. that.
Heather of the EO´s last blog ..soft
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Wow. You are one amazing and beautiful mama.
I feel privileged to read these words.
Sarah´s last blog ..39 Weeks! This could be my last pregnancy update!
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gorgeous, mama. I want to cuddle River so bad I can taste it. :)
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Isn’t it wonderful and terrible that these ones who are so sensitive land in the arms of sensitive mamas? I think it hurts our hearts in a deeper way, I think, when we hold them through the hard days. She is so beautiful and so, so precious.
Megan at SortaCrunchy´s last blog ..Saying Goodbye to October – and HELLO to Rebounding!
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Awww! that’s really one of the cutest & finest pictures i have seen in last few days! I am off t bed now, but i know when i get up it will give me a reason to smile in the morning too…
Thank you for posting it here!
Grant Brookes´s last blog ..Website Design Richmond
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So precious. :)
moxiemandie´s last blog ..On Home, by April
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She is absolutely adorable!
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what a sweet little one. so precious.
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