Suffer Well

by Arianne on February 15, 2010

snow collage

Have you ever

wondered

why God allows suffering?

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We pray and ask and beg Him to stop the suffering

to heal us.

and sometimes He does.

*

*

Other times He lets it linger

at tipping point, or

worsen, even.

*

*

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Could it be

He speaks to others

through our suffering?

*

*

That He knows

one thing we all share

is suffering, and

*

how we respond to healing

or not healing

is what matters most?

*

*

If we suffer well?

*

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If we hope and

believe

that healing is coming

no matter when it comes

*

could that be

the true test?

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Are you thankful for learning how to suffer?

*

{But as for me I will always have hope; I will praise You more and more….

Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter,

You will restore my life again;

from the depths of the earth

You will again bring me up.

You will increase my honor

and comfort me once again.

–Psalm 71:14, 20-21}

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{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }

Heather of the EO February 15, 2010 at 10:27 am

Yes, yes and yes. I don’t always suffer gracefully, that is for sure. But the hope in the healing is always there, sometimes buried. And when someone says that they see it, or feel it, through my words or any other way, I’m humbled. That’s where joy is, I think. Peace while we suffer. Because I’m pretty certain we are all always suffering, sometimes more than other times, but always.

Thank you.
Heather of the EO´s last blog ..I want to stop erasing My ComLuv Profile

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Arianne Reply:

@Heather of the EO, Yes we will always be suffering while in these fleshy skin coverings that are so temporary. We will always await something better. I think finding joy in these moments is what makes us complete. At least, complete for now.

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Mrs. Cline February 15, 2010 at 10:28 am

The pathway is broken
And the signs are unclear
And I don’t know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I’m gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to…
When I cross over Jordan, I’m gonna sing, gonna shout
Gonna look into your eyes and see you never let me down
So take me on the pathway that leads me home to you
And I will walk through the valley if you want me to – Ginny Owens

He’s leading us home to Him. He’s LEADING us HOME to HIM. HALLELUJAH!

Love you. xoxo.

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Arianne Reply:

@Mrs. Cline, I’m on my way to Jordan, I can’t see it clear yet, it’s still like a dim mirror, but it’s up ahead. I’m on my way.

Love this.

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Lara February 15, 2010 at 10:28 am

Yes and amen. I have thought so much about this very topic lately. As His daughters we have to believe that He is sovereign over our suffering–that as John Piper says, “He does not play ‘catch-up’ with the enemy.” If He allows suffering into the life of His child then it is for His ultimate glory and our ultimate good. He is that awesome. In my own personal sufferings, there is no firmer foundation upon which to stand. Thanks for asking such real questions–questions that touch the heart.

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Arianne Reply:

@Lara, yes so true. I think of how Satan needed God’s permission to even touch Job. Nothing we go through is a surprise to Him.

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Lara Reply:

@Arianne, yes, and Peter–asked to be sifted like wheat.
Lara´s last blog ..Enough Time My ComLuv Profile

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Lori (A Cowboy's Wife) February 15, 2010 at 10:37 am

As pathetic as it may sound, I feel like I suffer everyday. I feel like I’ll never heal from the things have hurt me most throughout my life. I feel like I’m not worthy of healing…like it’s my punishment of sorts for things that I did do bad or wrong. I’m hoping that I can heal enough one of these days to feel worthy of some good things that do come my way.

You, my friend, are so strong. I have no doubt that you will heal in mind, body and soul.

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Arianne Reply:

@Lori (A Cowboy’s Wife), Lori, there is One who loves you so completely, that will make you feel worthy like no human can. Jesus died for you just like He did for every soul on this planet. It’s on us to accept that Gift. To humble ourselves enough to ask for it.

You are so strong, and you don’t have to be. He can hold you and you can fall into His arms and cry until there are no tears left. He wants to do this for you.

I am here for you.
xoxo

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Ashleigh (Heart and Home) February 15, 2010 at 10:42 am

One of the most highlighted lessons I’ve learned this year is that He does speak to others through our suffering… and that our pain is not always in vain. Walking through a valley (because our world is fallen and pain is inevitable) not only shows our own hearts the reality of a loving, holding, caring, carrying Savior, but when He shines through our suffering, hope finds its way into the pained hearts of those around us, whatever their valley. Sometimes sharing sorrow with others stings the soul of the sharer and sometimes it’s therapeutic, but it’s always healing. We’re all learning how to suffer, aren’t we? Beautiful ponderings, sweet friend.
Ashleigh (Heart and Home)´s last blog ..Digging Out and Moving In My ComLuv Profile

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Joy February 15, 2010 at 10:45 am

Exactly. It’s the way we respond that God is interested in. Yesterday, I crashed into James 1:2-3 as if for the first time.

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”

My grief has indeed tested my faith, to the breaking point. In fact, it has broken and I’m rebuilding it. This verse reminds me that God intended to test my faith because he want to develop perseverance in me. My faith was imperfect, based on false understanding of God. It had to be broken and rebuilt. And when it is, and I learn perseverance?

“Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (verse 3)

Yes. And apparently this is so important to God that he will allow the kinds of suffering we’ve been through to develop it in us. Wow. Still trying to wrap my mind around that.

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Arianne Reply:

@Joy, Oh girl. I debated on which verses to use here, either the Psalms I went with or those verses from James. I ended up deciding to include them in the comments later if needed, and here you come taking care of that for me in the most beautiful way. {{happy sigh}}

To want for nothing. Still wrapping my head around that amazing thought…

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Esther Crawford February 15, 2010 at 10:54 am

Suffering is painful, but it’s part of the human condition I’m afraid – there’s no getting around it at some point, whether physical or psychological.

I remember in college I took a class on Buddhism and one of their major tenets is that “life is suffering”. They describe it as the root cause of harm in the world and that the way to grow is to let go of the attachments that cause the pain.

I think letting go is a very hard lesson to learn. Acceptance. In that way I think the Buddhists have figured something profound out – that life isn’t about clinging but about releasing. And in the release, we learn that happiness + joy isn’t found in other people or things… but in the stillness, in the connection.
Esther Crawford´s last blog ..Let’s Stay Together – Valentine’s Day My ComLuv Profile

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Arianne Reply:

@Esther Crawford, I love this Esther. Surrender, letting go of the resistance to feeling and working through it, is so hard sometimes. Other times we succeed at it and realize how badly it was needed. Thank you sweet friend.

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Amy Lupold Bair February 15, 2010 at 11:05 am

Yes, yes, yes! If I had not gone through such a traumatic beginning to my life as a mom, I would not be able to count my blessings as easily as I can today, or find perspective when “tragedies” that are simply minor transgressions cross my path.

It is also through my own sins that I was able to find God’s Grace, and without that, my life would be radically different.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this, Ari.
Amy Lupold Bair´s last blog ..Where in the World Is….Resourceful Mommy? My ComLuv Profile

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Arianne Reply:

@Amy Lupold Bair, Oh to fully understand Grace, better yet to know it. Amazing isn’t it? I need Grace as often as I need air and water. So thankful He gives it willingly.

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Corinne February 15, 2010 at 12:09 pm

I think you’re onto something…
And this:
“He speaks to others

through our suffering?”

Is what’s been getting me through recently.
You always put things so poetically, and so soulfully.
Corinne´s last blog ..Boots and guitars My ComLuv Profile

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Sara Joy February 15, 2010 at 1:47 pm

It’s funny, people have been saying the twins are our reward for “suffering well”. I don’t feel that way at all. I feel like my sister’s salvation was the reward, that I now have an easy platform to speak the Lord’s name, that is my reward. But walking through it, I never fathomed a reward, I sang the Ginny Owen’s song Natalie mentioned over and over and over, I walked through the valley simply because he asked me to. And I have been trying to do it the way he asked me to. That is all. No reward in sight, just obedience.
Sara Joy´s last blog ..Introduction My ComLuv Profile

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Arianne Reply:

@Sara Joy, The reward from that obedience is the healing, the honor of being called His, being used by Him. And ultimately eternal life not separated from Him. Everything else is just gravy. Wonderful giggling and drooling, gravy. :)

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Musings of a Housewife February 15, 2010 at 2:29 pm

This is a powerful post, Ari. I do believe there is a purpose to our suffering — it allows us to identify with Christ in His suffering, and it allows us to minister to others who are suffering and who will suffer, and it allows our faith to grow as long as we trust Him and don’t turn on Him. But none of this makes it any easier, does it? ((hug))
Musings of a Housewife´s last blog ..Learn to Cook Traditional Food: an eCourse My ComLuv Profile

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Arianne Reply:

@Musings of a Housewife, it’s interesting, because as we go along, the obedience in this makes it harder and beautiful, both at the same time. It’s this dichotomy I have yet to really be able to verbalize. It’s in the pot, simmering. :) I hope I can write it out some day.

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Erin February 15, 2010 at 2:47 pm

Oh man, I love Ginny Owens so much. I can’t get enough of her and love that Sara and Natalie love her, too.
Know what else I love? You, cupcakes, and spooning. Preferably all at once.

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Arianne Reply:

@Erin, spooning and anything with you are things I love. This must happen again soon. Must.

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Lisa at Heaven Sent February 15, 2010 at 3:31 pm

You amaze, inspire, and touch me with your insight and honesty. You reflect God’s love…even in your suffering. My continued prayers are with you and your family!
Lisa at Heaven Sent´s last blog ..Foto Friday: Round 3 My ComLuv Profile

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Grace February 15, 2010 at 4:35 pm

yes, yes, and yes.
Grace´s last blog ..The Adventure Continues…Always an Adventure part 2 My ComLuv Profile

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Bridget February 15, 2010 at 5:53 pm

My suffering is/was so very different from yours.
(But even when suffering through the same situation, no one’s suffering is just like yours, is it?)

What helped me, what may or may not help you was a short, not too preachy or overly intellectual book by C.S. Lewis: A Grief Observed. A very personal look at a very personal subject, but it touched my heart and my soul like few other books have.

Grace, peace and prayers to you…
Bridget´s last blog ..Some where along the way I lost myself. My ComLuv Profile

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Arianne Reply:

@Bridget, You’re right, no suffering is the same and yet it’s all from a similar carnal deep place and the remedy not that different. I adore C.S. Lewis and have read other work of his but somehow didn’t know about that one. Must get! Thank you :)

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Joy Reply:

@Bridget, “Grief Observed” is on my reading list too. I must pull it out soon. Thanks for the reminder.
Joy´s last blog ..Connect MEme Monday My ComLuv Profile

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thegypsymama Reply:

@Joy, A Grief Observed is the only book I have ever read that accurately described grief and the grieving process – from an insider’s perspective. I cannot recommend it highly enough!
thegypsymama´s last blog ..Ten things I learned from being snowbound for nearly ten days My ComLuv Profile

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Dawn @ My Home Sweet Home February 15, 2010 at 6:47 pm

This is really insightful. Sometimes we’re so caught up in leading our own lives that it’s easy to miss how they impact others.

Years ago we attended an early morning homeschool group event. Amazingly, all of my kids were wearing shoes and I had my hair fixed, make-up on, and we were on time. More than one mother who was feeling burned out and wondering if she could handle (a) more children, (b) continuing to homeschool, or (c) both came up to me and told me how I’d helped them that day.

That was the day I realized that as the mother of a large family, just having my act somewhat together could encourage others.

Suffering is never easy, but I agree that how you deal with it matters. Suffering in patience is a testimony to the hope within you.
Dawn @ My Home Sweet Home´s last blog ..Encouraging Your Child’s Creativity: A Writing Exercise My ComLuv Profile

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Arianne Reply:

@Dawn @ My Home Sweet Home, You inspire me so much, just being you. Pushing past the flesh is really what we are talking about, pushing and pushing when our comfort wants us to stop.

xoxo

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Muthering Heights February 15, 2010 at 9:26 pm

I think you’re right. In this fallen world, we are called to be the salt and the light…to show our peace as we rest in his grace. And that is HARD.
Muthering Heights´s last blog ..A Painter By Any Other Name… My ComLuv Profile

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Kelly @ Love Well February 15, 2010 at 11:01 pm

Yes. I doubt any of us are thankful for the pain. But the lessons learned in the valley are the most valuable.

Well said, Arianne.
Kelly @ Love Well´s last blog ..Backwards My ComLuv Profile

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thegypsymama February 15, 2010 at 11:21 pm

My mom died of leukemia one week to the day after I turned 18.

She suffered a long time first.

But, I will never never forget her saying to me, “When I read the Bible it seems to me that it was those that God loved best that suffered most of all.”

She whispered to me that she felt privileged the Lord would choose her to suffer alongside His other favorites.

I am still wrapping my head around that one.

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Casual Friday Every Day February 16, 2010 at 3:19 pm

We often find out who we really are when we’re in times of struggle or suffrage. Though I don’t believe God “allows” suffering (or brings it on, as some people say), I do know He is right there walking through it with you. One day we won’t live in a fallen world any more and we’ll only know love and joy.
Casual Friday Every Day´s last blog ..Pink and Red My ComLuv Profile

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In the Trenches of Mommyhood February 16, 2010 at 6:19 pm

I think you suffer gracefully, my friend. Kisses.
In the Trenches of Mommyhood´s last blog ..Happy Valentine’s Day My ComLuv Profile

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Meredith February 19, 2010 at 9:12 pm

I have been thinking a lot about suffering this season and my unwillingness to take up that burden of suffering, let alone, doing it with grace.

One of the verses that is helping me offer up that suffering for others is Phil 1:29: We have been granted “the privilege not only of believing in Christ, but of suffering for him as well.”

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Leslie February 22, 2010 at 12:13 am

thanks for sharing this. i feel like the photos you chose really communicated well, also. i’m so thankful for the sweet, unshakable hope that we have only in the Lord…
Leslie´s last blog ..red flags My ComLuv Profile

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